Hello. My name is Jessica Falconer, and I am officially the first, the only, Purple Pottamus Populist. Be afraid. Be very afraid. Even the late great Steve Irwin was afraid of hippos. And this purple hippo is pissed.
My children's education has just been threatened with an idiot who believes in creationism being appointed to Secretary of Education. My African American college roommates' lives and children's lives are about to be threatened by the appointment of white supremacist moron Jeff Sessions. And one of my lovely Maine senators, Susan Collins, is on board. I am going to make it my mission to be as obnoxious as possible to her in response. I promise I will show up to protest every single thing she shows up to here in Maine, and I'll make some of the ones in DC, too. Why? Because I can, so I should. I don't have lots of money - I live in a 1400 square foot 1940s house on the rather decrepit Swan Lake Avenue and I'm a school social worker - but I have a flexible schedule, am capable of taking an inexpensive train, and because others who want to go can't, I've got to represent. This is what I did at the Women's March.
With this presidential election, I almost renounced my Democrat affiliation. I was a registered Libertarian in Texas, and I am so disillusioned with the corruption of the DNC - which is really what won Trump the election - that a part of me wants to watch it die a painful death.
However, instead, I'm going to have fun. I'm going to harness my anger and my greatest talent: being obnoxious. I am going to do everything I can to irritate my legislators as well as the Democratic Party in general. I'm not a donkey and I'm sure as hell not a damned elephant. I'm a hippo and I'm pissed off.